IUSportCom’s Duncan Salek shares his frustration with his first fantasy football team.
I decided to cave in this year and join my floor’s league (you know, to keep up with social appearances and all). Unfortunately, Team “I Wilfork You Up” is off to a 1-6 start. Is it my inexperienced managerial skills to blame, or is every player just having a poor season? I like to think it’s the latter considering my offensive draftees, generally speaking, put up good numbers in the 2011 season. Let’s take a look.
1. Larry Fitzgerald – I know he doesn’t have the greatest of quarterbacks throwing to him, but the wide receiver can always be depended on to get some big yards. I’m not as displeased with Fitzgerald’s three touchdowns in seven games as I am with his inconsistency. He has been very limited and has had no more than four receptions in three of his seven games, leaving me like this from week to week:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LCcKBcZzGdA (obviously censored)
2. Cam Newton – The reigning Offensive Rookie of the Year and Pro Bowl selection is having a rough year to say the least. His Panthers have lost five straight, and Newton—who threw for 21 touchdowns last season and rushed for 14—is in the center of everything. “I’m sad,” Newton told reporters after Sunday’s loss to the Cowboys. OK, he may have worded it differently, but that’s what I took from it as a disgruntled fantasy owner. Was I wrong to pick Newton? Not at all, it’s Cam Newton! That guy has won everything. Then again, Newton did throw 17 picks last season.
7. LeGarrette Blount – Just kidding, this was a bad choice on my part. The Tampa Bay running back was dropped after week four, when I realized I didn’t once start him. I picked him because I was running out of time on my draft clock, and then I saw his name and remembered this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SGTYiCqzpcw
Whoops, I meant this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y_mayV_AFMI
12. Justin Blackmon – No. 1 receiver, my Alps. Sure, he was selected to a team that totaled five wins last year, but the rookie out of Oklahoma State has got to be putting up fantasy points outside the interval of 0 to 4. He is still touchdown-less, but I haven’t lost faith in Blackmon yet (it’s just decreasing very slowly). For now, he’ll ride the pine with Mr. Hillis and Jacquizz Rodgers.
16. Detroit Lions Defense – I also had limited options in my last pick, but I expected better from the team that went 10-6 in 2011. Granted, their offense isn’t anything to write home about this year either, but when you have that vicious freight train in Ndamukong Suh at defensive tackle, you got to think Detroit’s defense should have some spark.
One can probably infer that I did not make the smartest choices, but I wouldn’t say my offense is completely bad. Is anyone else struggling in their leagues this year, or is it just a first time thing? Whatever, I guess there’s a reason it’s called “fantasy.” Yet I can still sleep sound at night knowing my fifth-round pick is taking snaps for the only undefeated team in the NFL. So I thank you, Mr. Ryan, for bearing with me through this roller coaster season so far. We’ll reach the top soon enough. Though as we all know, everything that goes up must eventually come down.
